be careful when you make a bet

The Internal Revenue Service decides to audit Mike, and summons him to an appointment with the most thorough auditor in the office. The auditor is not surprised when Mike shows up with his attorney.The auditor says, 'Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I'm not sure the IRS finds that believable.''I'm a great gambler, and I can prove it,' says Mike. 'How about a demonstration?'The auditor thinks for a moment and says, 'Okay. You're on!'Mike says, 'I'll bet you a $1,000 that I can bite my own eye.'The auditor thinks a moment and says, 'No way! It's a bet.'Mike removes his glass eye and bites it.The auditor's jaw drops.Mike says, 'Now, I'll bet you $2,000 that I can bite my other eye.'The auditor can tell Mike isn't blind, so he takes the bet. Mike removes his false teeth and bites his good eye. The stunned auditor now realizes he has bet and lost $3,000, with Mike's lawyer as a witness. He starts to get nervous.'Would you like to go double or nothing?' Mike asks. 'I'll betyou $6,000 that I can stand on one side of your desk and piss into that rubbish bin on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between.'The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully and decides there's no way Mike can manage that stunt, so he agrees again.Mike stands beside the desk and unzips his trousers, but although he strains for all his worth , he can't make the stream reach the bin on the other side, so he pretty much urinates all over the auditor's desk.The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a major loss into a big win. But Mike's lawyer moans and puts his head in his hands.'Are you okay?' the auditor asks.'Not really,' says the attorney. 'This morning, when Mike told me he'd been summoned for an audit, he bet me $20,000 that he could come in here and piss all over your desk - and that you'd be happy about it.'